It rained off and on throughout the next day before Ivey called that evening from a pay phone on post. He asked me out to the movies on a double date with Jodie and one of his friends. But it would also have to wait until he returned from field training that was expected to last at least ten days.

During that same week, I received a call from overseas. It was from someone I wasn't in the mood to talk to, especially since our relationship was a rocky one from the very beginning and somehow only seemed to get worse. But I took the call and it only confirmed what I already knew. I made a mistake. I wanted out of the marriage. I was tired of dealing with his bull and didn't want to hear it anymore. "Larry, I want a divorce." Of course I knew he would make it difficult. He made everything difficult. It was almost as if he lived to start trouble. A side I thought would change after we got married. Even though we had talked about parting ways before, I knew he would drag things out. That was just his way. But this time...I wanted to make it final. Make it official. And the sooner...the better.

A couple weeks later Ivey and I double dated with my girlfriend and his buddy from Fort Carson. Although that spark just didn't happen for our friends, Ivey and I continued seeing each other nearly every day. After a month we shacked up and our relationship blossomed. And over the next several months we lived in our own little world as we carried on like two love struck teenagers. While living in the moment, it was as if we couldn't get enough of one another. We were always together. Then one day things changed. Ivey brought up the topic of planning a future together, which I'll admit, I hadn't thought that far ahead. Especially with my marriage still looming in the background. A situation I hadn't even told Ivey about yet. Nor did I know how to tell him or what I was going to say.

In January of '85, Ivey found out he had orders to be stationed overseas in Germany and he asked me to be his wife and go with him. And it was then I decided I had to tell him the truth. Although I knew it was going to hurt him. I couldn't see any other way around it. I didn't want to write him a Dear John letter and leave. I still had to apologize and hope he could find it in his heart to forgive me. Which I did tell him and he left that day needing time to himself. But he also came back. Wanting to stand beside me until my divorce did become final.

But I didn't want him to do that. I felt guilty about lying to him in the first place. I didn't want to jump into another marriage knowing it started out the same as my marriage to Larry. And about a month before he was suppose to be shipped out, I ended up breaking our relationship. One of the most difficult things I had to do at my young age. Little did I realize how attached I was to him. And I even tried to contact him once after that...but I never could get hold of him.

FLASH FORWARD....Twenty-one years later (which was last year) with the world wide web at hand I searched a popular alumni site and found Ivey's name registered. Because he has an unusual name, I knew it had to be him and jotted a quick email for verification. The next day, he wrote me back. It was my long ago lost love. But this time...I was honest when I found him about everything I wasn't before. Today, we still keep in touch online and have a new friendship growing...although we have never seen one another other than through pictures. And I still don't know if our friendship will develop into something more. But it's nice to know he doesn't hate me, although if he did, I would truly understand.

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